You will have noticed that I have not been writing much
recently. I think it worthwhile – both for
the sake of those of you who regularly visit as well as for my own – to try to
work through the reasons why. Perhaps
this exercise will help open the logjam.
To begin, I don’t like that I am not writing much; it is one
of the things I enjoy – to learn, explore, and to try to understand / describe
/ explain / communicate; to receive feedback that helps me improve in all
aspects. A close cousin is that I am
also not reading much – my usual sites, a stack of books waiting for me, etc.
The most direct reason is that my schedule in the real world
has been consumed by both a work project and some personal projects. I am past the workload peak, but I am not
sure how soon I will get past the mental peak – where I am therefore able to
keep my thoughts focused on writing.
About ten days ago, I felt a sudden mental freedom – I don’t
know from where it came. I put out about
three pieces in 2-3 days. I really
enjoyed that I was able to do that. Then,
it went away.
In any case, the workload cannot explain all of it; even when
I have had some available time, I have found that I am not able to focus on
writing something. I think the events of recent months – the escalation
of tensions regarding Ukraine, the incessant propaganda regarding ISIS, the
flood of information regarding CIA torture, etc. – have overwhelmed me.
Not overwhelmed in a sense of hopelessness (I can never fall
into this); more like a sense of what to make of it – trying to make some sense
out of all of it. There are times when –
while reading someone’s view of the various events – I feel I capture a brief
mental glimpse of some reasonable interpretation, a needle in their haystack
that points me to something bigger, something else; but then it disappears,
with me left unable to put any of it into words or even remember it. And then I get (mentally) caught up again in
these projects….
It isn’t clear to me which logjam needs breaking – the projects
or my ability to mentally make some sense out of these recent events. In the meantime, I really miss writing.
Here's hoping the logjam breaks soon.
ReplyDeletePerhaps this is a period of reflection as new material presents itself. A close friend is always saying, "in the light of new information..."
DeleteAnd if I may, you might take some time to contemplate the consequences of bank created debt money... it's the consequences that really matter. Just knowing that banks create money out of thin air with every "loan" while shocking does not really reveal the depth of the hole we've gotten into. It will take time and effort to advance your understanding but you will gain a whole new appreciation for what's occurring and why.
Try, you might like it.
I offer the following free advise: pretend that you will only be allowed to write one more article and so you must summarize everything that you think needs saying and further pretend that your only reader will be 12 years old and you must depend on that reader to remember your message and present it to the world.
ReplyDeleteJohn, your comment was very helpful. Thank you.
DeleteWe miss you, too. Now for some unsolicited advice. Be patient with yourself.
ReplyDeletePatient with myself? I feel like I had no choice!
DeleteThanks
My comment was intended to be helpful. True, if you have no choice then you must wait. Patience is an attitude that can be adopted while one waits, especially if one has no choice. I see you have a new article. Good on you.
Deletegpond, it was helpful and I apologize if my reply seemed to discount this. That it was important enough for you to provide feedback was valuable to me.
DeleteImpatience was often not possible because I could not focus long enough on the situation to even be impatient.
I would think of something to write - something that I could easily have dealt with normally - open a (digital) page, stare at the blank, then close it. I didn't feel a frustration - sometimes a sense of loss, maybe?
I took encouragement from your comment and many others on this topic.
I misunderstood your situation a little. I have a friend whose answer to any adversity up to and including the flu and a broken leg is to "just push through it." Sometimes that is not the answer, I was trying to suggest to you. I was afraid I would sound too 'new age' if I went on to offer that maybe a revelation is about to unfold, or that maybe your brain was assimilating something that would bring you back stronger and wiser. Though that is what I suspected. Your new article looks like a tour-de-force, and one worth waiting for. So I too thank John for his helpful suggestion. And glad to have you back in the saddle. (Cowboy reference..)
DeleteThank you for the feedback - here and always.
Delete"...maybe your brain was assimilating something..."
This seems to be part of what was going on. It would have taken a lot of mental computing power for me to put into words that which I posted today even without the other distractions of real life. But real-life consumed a larger-than-normal portion of processing capability - if you know what I mean.
So the computing speed was slowed...tremendously.
Give them all the finger and come to Idaho. We will chase cows,and talk
ReplyDeletePhilosophy."Its life, not a rehearsal"!!!!!!!!!!
Owyhee Cowboy
Thanks for the update, b-m-.
ReplyDeleteMe, I have been having trouble reading and meditating, lately.
Me, I think that there are serious spiritual changes and battles (all good!) going on behind the scenes, which manifest as agitation and distraction for us.
Your writing muse will return at the appropriate time, I am positive, b-m-.
My blogging has been limited to the extent that I realize I have almost nothing original or of value to say, and that not as cleverly as I may suppose. I think that you may be overwhelmed by the Narrative which is designed to distract and confuse. Keep your eye on the actions of the empire and I'm sure the juices will begin to flow. Propaganda can be beautiful in a way, but mishandled is an offence that demands indignation. I've been spending much time on the Saker blog. it's amazing how good the Russians are at threading through bullshit from long practice. We've only had to cope with postmodern politics for about 25years. BM - spread the truth, get angry and call down the lightning. bastards need crushing. forward, individual comrades!
ReplyDeleteBM, you really have nothing to fret about. Creative activity - almost everything worth doing is potentially creative because of the lurking possibility of a new insight of some sort - is not a linear function of time and effort. It's counter-intuitive, but creativity is usually messy and spontaneous much like a free market. Akin to central planning, trying harder will not necessarily produce satisfying results. For best results the exact opposite - inactivity - is often called for.
ReplyDeleteOur minds are continually processing information and making connections outside of our consciousness. Once a serious mental exertion has been made to solve a problem and then abandoned, the seeds have been planted for one's subconscious to take over and nurture new ideas.
I have repeatedly observed this phenomenon in my thinking and in that of others. This is the nature of the creative process and why its seeming effortlessness is mysterious to those who equate the output of new ideas with ramped up effort.
So, go try it. To spawn new ideas and insights, give up your writing and do something unrelated, fun and even silly. Your subconscious will call you back after it's constructed something new offstage for your consideration.